Part-time Ho’

I have made a decision today to continue being a ho’
All these years of perfecting this talent
And now I am supposed to give it up for a beau?
I love having sex, making love, fucking or whatever you want to call it
With as many people as possible and as often as I can.

So now because I found someone who is cooler than cool
I’m supposed to give all that up?
Think of it as me having a closet full of clothes
I’ll always have my favorite shirt and pants
But I can only wear one shirt at a time.

If I had my way I would sleep with everyone in this room.
A few of you more than once because you look that good to me
Just think of me as a door know; everyone gets a turn
A fantasy fulfiller is what they called me in the Persian era
But a slut is what they call me in present day America.

I tried that monogamy stuff but everyone always wants more.
No one is ever simply satisfied with me.
So since I’m not enough for one man,
I figured I’d be the reason for lust and desire for all that I can.

A relationship takes two people giving 50/50
Meeting the other person halfway or somewhere along the path
I heard about that 80/20 thing
When the one you’re with gives you 80% of what you need
But they leave you wanting 20% more

So I figured that my 80 would be fine with him having most of me.
Now for that other 20%, I would divide it amongst the 7 Billion people on this earth that God blesses me to see.
I would just be busting nutts in as many places as I can
With as many people who would allow
And when I’m done
I’d go home to my man!

I ask your opinion, Should I continue down the faith path alone or join in with the rest of the world
To be or not to be a PART-TIME HO’


Ivy Thoughts

Compromise

I was on the phone with my baby earlier and we had a conversation about compromise except all he got from it was that I wanted sex. I tried to point out that compromise was an agreement made between two people but with me and my sex crazed history I guess I couldn’t point out what I really wanted to say. Too many people feel that compromise takes away from who they are as an individual, or is a sign of weakness or makes them appear to be the passive partner in a relationship. Compromise is nothing like that at all unless you make the wrong compromises! What are ‘wrong compromises'? Wrong compromises are where you have you suffered a loss when you compromised with someone. If a compromise makes you feel taken advantage of or wronged then it is not a healthy compromise in any type of relationship. As long as you are not being taken advantage of, a decision made in a relationship to better the relationship is a good one. Often times a compromise is an agreement so that both parties are happy. In any compromise both sides give up something so that they meet in the middle because both sides want to be happy but they give in a little to make the other person happy or to “keep the peace” at home.
Refusing to compromise is a sign of selfishness and a level of immaturity. No one side is ever made happy by getting everything that they want. Even the sun has to share the sky with the moon. No matter how powerful or dominant you are, a balance comes when you can coexist. My grandmother always told me to never say never because you never know what you will or won’t do. Depending on the situation, I can say that I have already done many things that I said I would never do. But I guess I am different. When do you draw the line at compromising? How do know when you have given too much of yourself? Does any one side give up more than the other? These are questions that I thought I knew the answer to but I now see that “change” is truly the only true constant in the world.
Dictionary.com says that compromise is an agreement reached by mutual concession. Mutual is interchangeable with common. Most agreements are made with one common goal of making both parties happy, if happiness is not able to be reached then no agreement is made. What are you willing to give up to ensure someone’s happiness? Do you truly care about the happiness of others? Is selfishness a learned ability? I need answers let me know what you all think.

And this was on the mind of Ivy Thoughts,

If you’re not wearing green, you better be wearing Jade!!!!!!!

It ain’t easy being me

I often wonder why people fail to understand
That love is a gift promised to every man
You can’t love me and not like me
Or hate me and try to pray for me
Just take me as me
The only me I can be

I fail to see why people say you’re not normal
When normal is simply the common type
I’ve never fit into that outfit
So why all the hype
I’m naturally me without any influence from you
I don’t walk around destroying individuals
Putting them into boxes
That’s not cool
Everyone is different
We’re fearfully and wonderfully made
It ain’t easy being me
But me is the only me I can be

I patiently try to understand you all
You people who judge indecently
Who say that I shouldn’t live like that
Or say that I’m not the person you thought I would be
You uphold a standard for me
And you truly fail to see
That perfection is simply the highest degree of excellence
Measured by man
A flawed example to me
So that’s why it’s so easy being me
Because being me is the only me
That I know how to be

So take your standards and live up to them yourself
Let me mind my own business if you’re not gonna help
You’re wasting your breath talking about me
So mind your own business and take your mouth off of me
Because it ain’t easy being me
With people out there being you
But me is the only me that I know how to be!



Ivy Thoughts

It’s not what you are called; it’s what you answer to…..

The other day, I was driving on the expressway. Traffic was merging into one lane and I was in the main lane that the traffic was merging into. The other lane was to yield to my lane. Now there was this woman driving a BMW 325i. I was just going down the highway and ended up cutting her off because she failed to yield to me (my lane). We drive along and get on the main highway and suddenly I hear blowing and I look over to my left and this woman was honking her horn, sticking up her middle finger and yelling obscenity. She even called me a “nigger”. Now the average young black male in Dallas, TX would have run her off the road and made her regret saying that. Me, on the other hand, I just waved and smiled at her. I even blew her a kiss. My methodology was to kill her with kindness. Road rage is a disease that can overtake the strongest person but I refused to allow her name calling take me to a place of regret. She made sure that I knew she called me a nigger because she blew the horn and yelled it over and over again. To me that word simply means “stingy”. I take no offense when someone says that word because it does not apply to me. Communication is based on perception and my perception of that encounter was that lady was pissed off and could do nothing else but yell and scream. Had she been paying attention to the signs on the road she would have slowed down and not even been put in a situation where her blood pressure would be raised. I was once told by a professor of mine that words are only letters and the meaning that we tie to them truly defines them. To a middle aged African American person ‘nigger’ would be an insult. To a teenager ‘nigger’ would be a slang term referring to a friend but to me it simply means stingy. So to all the people in the world who don’t like the word, I implore you to live above the influence and be reminded of the past but let us not get stuck there.

And this was on the mind of Ivy Thoughts,

If you’re not wearing green, you better be wearing Jade!!!!!!!!!!

Friendship

I was once told that friends come and go, Brothers and sisters are suppose to be close, and Family is the boiling pot for hope and love. Recently I found out that there are some stipulations to all of that. When is too much, too much? Can we as humans really forgive like God does? Or are we really like the nail in the wall story? (You can take the nail out and paint over the hole but the hole is still there.)

I often wonder if the people who say that they love you, if they really mean it unconditionally or has that condition just not shown up to where they will draw a line on that love. I have been in many situations with people who have done some horrible things to me and even embarrassed me but it is the Love of Christ that makes me love them inspite of.

Where are the unconditional friendships of the past? Did they ever exist? Or are friends like automobiles; every few years you need to upgrade to a new model? Or do you keep what you have and make upgrades to it.

I am truly at a crossroads now. I have a problem and I understand that it needs to be fixed. But Rome wasn't built in a day. And I really don't feel like waiting on the construction site to close. Niether do I feel like the ridicule that comes with the transition process. But if something is worth it, you can deal with anything.

Life changes, trees die, and a friend of mine once said that "People are dying that have never died before". But in closing all I have to say is a mistake is a mistake and forgiveness is not for the other person, it's for you.!!!!

And this was on the mind of Ivy Thoughts,

If you're not wearing green, you better be wearing Jade!!!!

Thank You

I wrote this poem and performed it at my 30th birthday party. I hope you all like it.

Three decades ago I was pushed into the world
I came across many of you
Who were confused little boys and girls.
I started an early journey of touching the lives of every person that I met
Some good, som bad and some ended in places that were hot and wet

I am proud of every mistake that I've made
They have taught me to be a better man.
I have even been shown secret places
That have revealed the dirt of familiar faces
But I hold it all in
Because to let it out would be a sin

I want to take the time to thank all of you
Those invited, and the ones you brought too
You all show signs of love that I could never compare
To our past experiences together, I'm just glad you care

I know at times I can be unbearable to say the least
But I am glad you are here because I come in peace
So finally I say thank you and I am glad you came
And remember all that you ask for, do it in Jesus' name!!!!

Encourage Yourself!!!!!!!!

There is a song by Donald Lawrence that says, “Sometimes you have to encourage yourself,” and I find it difficult to do that sometimes. I am normally an arrogant person who is just all about ‘self’ but recently my life has been turned upside down and I have been on a humbling mission. I have learned to respect the opinion of others, I have seen the value in people and I now understand that I am not the center of the universe. But with all this knowledge and wisdom, why is it so hard for others to encourage you. Why do people point out the obvious? I never understand why people see a homeless person and say, “Why are you homeless?” The statement that should be made is, “Here is a fresh set of clothing and I will take you to a place that is hiring so that you can better your situation.” Instead, humans, never take the time to help someone. I find it hard to believe that we live in America, also known as the land of opportunity, and there is no opportunity. People play on the negatives and just brush past the positives. Look at President Bill Clinton, everyone remembers the story about the intern, but they fail to publicize the economic surplus. Everyone remembers the murder of Nicole but forget about all the games that OJ won. We can quickly recall the cases against Michael Jackson, but few can recall that he was the first World Icon (outside of Jesus Christ). The list could go on forever. The news is filled with all of the killings, robberies, fires, car jacking, and negative celebrity news but where is the positive stuff. Our society has become a society driven off of negativity but you would have to just understand that because we started in a negative way. How can you say in God we trust, but you force the originals owners of America on to reservations? But many people feel that we earned what we have, no we took it. So sometimes it is hard to encourage your self when you face our negative history or you just look around and see all of the negativity. I think the song should be rewritten and say, “All the time you have to encourage yourself.”
So people please take the time to be good to others and no matter how they receive you, JUST BE NICE! Smile at that stranger that didn’t hold the door for you. Wave at that person that cut you off in traffic. Like the person that actually took the time to research it, remember it takes 43 muscles to frown and only 23 to smile. When you are nice your day becomes more pleasant!

And this as on the mind of Ivy Thoughts,

If you’re not wearing green, you better be wearing Jade!!!!!!!!!!!