Forgive and Forget or not?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?

So I have a friend who keeps saying things that I have not said. They add stuff to the small things that I do say and try to make it seem like so much more when it was nothing to begin with. I try to be nice and just keep my cool but today I snapped out in a nice way. I expressed my self by saying too much but not saying everything. After I had finished posting my information on the web I began to get calls from close friends telling me that I was wrong. I agreed with them but it was too late, I couldn’t take it back. I could click delete but the damage was done. I feel no remorse because I feel justice was served. It is wrong for me to feel this way and I know God will forgive me but I am not sure if my (ex) friend will. If I could go back in time I wouldn’t change a thing. Some things were shown to people and I hope it doesn’t change how they see me. I am truly a good person at heart but when I am pushed to my limit, I don’t know where to stop. I have learned tact but it is never understood by the object of objection. I mean only to enhance and not to destroy but the truth is never meant to comfort or to ease any pain, the truth is just meant to be. I do my best at being real but even God is rejected for the truth that he has set forth. But time heals all wounds and even if a scar is left the pain is no more. I pray that everyone learns to forgive but always remember the paths that you trod because the future is really funny about leading you right back down some familiar roads.

And this was on the mind of Ivy Thoughts

If you’re not wearing green, you better be wearing Jade!!!!!!!

The Other Man

We laugh and talk like nothing else is going on.
Our time together seems to just go on and on forever.
When I am weak,
When we’re together, you make me strong
I get excited about seeing you
No matter for how long
We have together
5 min here
6 hours there
Every now and then a weekend escapade
That keeps me watching
Wanting
And waiting.

I love it when you hold me
And I hold you
You kiss me
And I kiss you
My heart melts
At the thought of you.
I complete you and you complete me.
We are as happy as happy can be
But you just don’t understand
How I hate being
The other man!!!

REAL

Sometimes I try to figure people out. I wonder if they will be helpful or if they will turn their backs on you. You know that real people are the hardest people to come across. With everyone looking at what they can get out of a situation, instead of helping just because, it is hard to welcome everyone you meet. You have to look at the character of a person and see the environment in which they came. Then you can make a decision based on the actions of that person. Don’t judge a book by its cover because sometimes the best novels have the worst artwork on the cover. I found that it is through experiencing a person and entreating them, that you see the real them. I show myself as a faithful and caring person to everyone I meet, but sometimes I am rejected because I am blunt and honest and people can’t accept the truth. But the truth is something that is needed and it is always respected. So if you ever come across me in real-life, just understand that I see the truth. I am honest and I look for that in you.

And This was on the Mind of Ivy Thoughts,



If you're not wearing green, you better be wearing Jade!!!!!

ZERO DEGREES OF SEPARATION

I met a man in Louisiana
Who fucked a man in Texas
That knew a man in California
That caught Syphilis from a man in Missouri
Who told another man from New Jersey
That he caught HIV from a man in Ohio

But the same man from Texas
Was also fucking my friend from Mississippi
Who was also fucking the man from California
Who caught crabs from a man in New Mexico
That tested positive for Aids in the same state of Ohio

Now for my friend from Mississippi
He was giving head to my friend in Illinois
Who caught gonorreah from a man in Maryland
Who was fucking my friend in Washington DC
That caught Chlamydia from a man in Florida
Who picked that up in Tennessee

The man from California
Spent his summers in Alabama
With a man from Idaho
Who has a set of twin boys in Wisconsin
That I had sex with in Georgia

They knew the man in New Mexico
And made a video with twins in Nevada
Who were infected by my friend from Arkansas
Who died at 33 because he was infected in North Carolina
With blood transferred from Kentucky

See it all doesn’t come from sex
Just the right places at the wrong time
I am glad I used a condom
Because my friends weren’t so lucky
Those twins born with AIDS
I never thought I’d meet

Zero degrees of separation
I thought it was six
But now I see


Ivy Thoughts

12 Months

I am sick and tired of you looking at everything that I do.
Quit following me around thinking that I like you.
I tolerate you because I see God’s greater plan
But if you don’t stay out of my business I might have to slap you ass.

You want to follow me on twitter
Because I ignored your facebook request
I sit next to you every Sunday
And you wish to stand and say you’re blessed

I am sick of explaining why I am the way that I am
I didn’t choose it and it’s not an option so why do you give a damn
Leave me the hell alone because I am really not worried about you
I pray because I see your faults but I refuse to judge you

I live in a glass house so I refuse to throw stones
Take 12 months to mind your own damn business
And leave me the hell alone!


Ivy Thoughts

What happens when??????

You feel like you are all alone. You want to talk to that special someone that just makes you smile. What happens when you want to show someone that you care but you feel that you are doing too much? How do you know when you have saturated someone with all of you? You feel that you are just being you. When is too much not enough? How do you take it when someone says, “You love me too much.”? When your whole heart and being just wants to give that love to someone else? What do you do when you completely love yourself? What happens when you show your heart to someone and you trust them undoubtedly? When you feel they can do you no harm but you have given your heart away? What happens when you don’t get the answer you expect? When you go down lover’s lane do you expect to find regret? When your heart is just longing for someone to help?
These are just a few questions that I want an answer to. My grandmother always said that when it comes to love, experience is the best teacher. People always have advice to give when it comes to matters of the heart but because the heart is deceitful from birth, you never know what is what. Someone with out knowledge of me would say that from the aforementioned questions that a stalker or a crazy person could be born from those same questions. But in the end I know that if I ever have a negative answer to the questions about love, I would just pick myself up and wait until ‘love’ gives me the next opportunity to love again. For if I let a negative situation stop me from trusting someone based on my past then I have failed as a lover by nature. I refuse to give up on sharing this beautiful feeling with the world because I was made to love. Love myself first and then everyone else as I love me. But being ‘in love’ is completely different. This is when you are taken to the next level or you allow yourself to freely care about someone unconditionally without any discretion (in my opinion). But like the song says “Why do fools fall in love?” No one will ever be able to answer that question but the very mysterious heart. I love you!!!!!


And this was on the mind of Ivy Thoughts,

If you’re not wearing green, you better be wearing Jade!!!!!

An Addiction

There is something about you that I just can’t quite explain
Why do I feel like this?
Why do you touch me and I feel no pain?
I go over in my head the good things about you
Like how you make me feel, not physical
But that’s good too!

I compare you to the past but you don’t fit.
You went against everything I believed in
But I felt that this was the right commitment.
I tried to fit you into an equation
But x equaled nothing out side of infinity.

So I took it upon my self to tell you how I would feel
To let you know about my past and to show you I’m real.
I asked you questions to get to know you
When I already knew who you were
I told you things about me and you felt who I was

On to the test drive to see if we like the ride.
Bumping and grinding came with ease
So we decided to buy.
No leases and no payment plans
It was cash built on faith
Hearts put up for deposit
No time to wait

It’s a strange feeling and I love how it makes me feel
1 plus 1 equals 2 but in this dimension only love is real
I had to tell you this
So that no one would be amiss
I think I found An Addiction
And it started with a kiss!!!!


Ivy Thoughts

What would I do if I could feel?

In the movie “The Whiz”, the Tin Man asked this question over and over again. When all along he could feel, all the time he cried for “Tini” his metal wife. She put him in a position that too many people currently live in today. I took a long shower today and I looked in the mirror and I was happy to say, “I like what I see!” Many people today can’t say that or don’t even know how to put those words together in a sentence referring to themselves. I sometimes wish I could make everyone see the beauty in themselves. But you know how society always says those sayings, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”, “Beauty is only skin deep”, “One mans trash is another man’s treasure”. All of these sayings give way for someone else to validate what is beautiful. I love the song that Lena Horne sang, “Believe in Yourself”, because it shows that we ultimately determine how other people see us. Through our confidence, we can allow someone to treat us in a certain way. It is all about self empowerment. You fail first in your mind. I can’t help you if you can’t see what’s wrong with you. My good friend Ricki always says that the first step is denial and the second step is admittance. If we could get people past step one so many lives could be changed. So if you have ever had a down moment when you feel that you don’t look as good as the next person or even if that next person is better looking than you, take the time to encourage yourself. Because confidence in the end is all you have.

And this was on the mind of Ivy Thoughts.
If you’re not wearing green, you better be wearing Jade!!!!!

Tick Tock

Tick tock goes the clock

The seconds just keep on passing

Growing older

A few of us getting wiser

As time refuses to slow for our sorry asses

Tick tock goes the clock

The minutes grow shorter by the day

In the mirror I look and now I see signs of gray

Tick tock goes the clock

The hours change just as fast and the seconds

Seemed like slavery was abolished yesterday

And now Hispanics are fighting to stay

Tick tock goes the clock

The days grow shorter by the hour

A woman’s love is sweet

But in my mouth has grown sour

Tick tock goes the clock

The weeks just keep passing me by

Pants hanging lower

Skirts getting shorter

Soon everyone will be naked, but Why?

Tick tock goes the clock

The months keep slipping my mind

Gays wanting to get married

And straits try to make it a crime.

Tick tock goes the clock

The years just blow in the wind

Listening to R & B music

When did it become a sin?

Tick tock goes the clock

And time keeps passing me by

Seconds, Minutes, Hours, Days

Weeks, Months, Years and still

No answer to why?

Ivy Thoughts